Gossip can refer to trivial talk, which is generally harmless, but when it involves talking about others behind their backs in either a derogatory fashion or concerning personal matters, it’s definitely wrong. This includes putting a negative spin on what the person in question says and does. Although there are sometimes legitimate reasons for discussing a person’s possible flaws and questionable character, like work or ministry situations (hiring, promoting or demoting, etc.), outside of these obvious exceptions it becomes gossip.

Why is gossip wrong? For one thing, because the victim of the condescending talk isn’t present to defend himself or herself. The first person to present a case against another always sounds right with enough bluster; that is, until you hear an honest account of the other side (Proverbs 18:17).

Secondly, because speaking badly of people behind their back smacks of arrogance, which is a superiority complex. When individuals tear others down or make fun of them, they’re in essence lifting themselves up.

Thirdly, gossip is just plain ignoble and suggests a “two-face” personality. Gossipers will usually put on friendly airs in the presence of their victims, but then proceed to destroy them behind their backs with the “sword of their mouth” (Proverbs 25:18).

Fourthly, whether the gossiper realizes it or not, the gossip will poison people’s minds against the victim. In other words, it contaminates a person’s perspective of someone who’s not present, which causes division.

Lastly, gossip is wrong because the information might not even be true. It might only be partially correct or wholly false. When this happens, the gossip becomes slander or false testimony! Even if the gossip starts out as accurate it becomes less accurate the more people it goes through, meaning it devolves into slander. As such, those who engage in this kind of gossip are breaking one of the moral commandments: “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor”!

For all these reasons, God hates gossip, which can be observed in the book of Proverbs and its list of seven sins that the Creator especially hates:

There are six things the LORD hates,

    seven that are detestable to him:

        ¹⁷haughty eyes,

        a lying tongue,

        hands that shed innocent blood,

        ¹⁸a heart that devises wicked schemes,

        feet that are quick to rush into evil,

        ¹⁹a false witness who pours out lies

        and a person who stirs up conflict in the community.

Proverbs 6:16-19

Three of these seven are directly linked to gossip and another is indirectly linked. A “lying tongue” and a “false witness who pours out lies” bespeak of a gossiper because, again, gossip naturally devolves into slander. A “person who stirs up conflict in the community” also points to gossip because hostility and division are the results of gossip (Proverbs 16:28).

Lastly, “haughty eyes” is indirectly tied to gossip because haughty eyes stem from a proud heart (Proverb 21:4) and pride is the root cause of gossip. Pride gives birth to envy, jealousy and rivalry, and the result is gossip—defaming the person in question.

Gossips Are Fools Who Hurt and Cause Dissension

Proverbs is the book of godly wisdom; notice what it blatantly says about those who gossip and slander:

…whoever spreads slander is a fool.

Proverbs 10:18

With his mouth the godless destroys his neighbor…

Proverbs 11:9

A person who lacks judgment derides his neighbor…

Proverbs 11:12

A perverse person stirs up conflict,

    and a gossip separates close friends.

Proverbs 16:28

Gossips & slanderers are fools who destroy others with their tongue, which is the “sword” of their mouth. People who regularly engage in gossip & slander are “perverse” because they naturally stir up conflict and destroy relationships. They destroy relationships because, on some level, they’re jealous or envious of the bond in question. For instance, they might be envious of the loyalty someone has toward their rival and so they naturally gravitate toward destroying that relationship with gossip & slander.

It has been said that small minds talk about people, average minds talk about things and great minds talk about ideas. People who are gossips & slanderers reveal how small they are—they’re small-minded fools.

By contrast, godly people—those who are “like God”—build others up with their tongues through encouragement, knowledge and appropriate correction:

The tongue of the righteous is choice silver,

Proverbs 10:20

The lips of the righteous nourish many,

Proverbs 10:21

Let a righteous man strike me—that is a kindness;

    let him rebuke me—that is oil on my head.

My head will not refuse it,

Psalm 141:5

The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life,

    but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.

Proverbs 10:11

That last one reveals something about gossip & slander: It’s verbal violence which attacks people with words behind their backs. As such, the tongue of gossips & slanderers is their weapon:

Like a club or a sword or a sharp arrow

    is one who gives false testimony against a neighbor.

Proverbs 25:18

It’s natural to think of “false testimony” in the sense of a witness in a court trial but, really, anytime someone shares information about another person that isn’t accurate it’s a form of false testimony—it’s testifying to other people against that person and, consequently destroying his or her reputation. People who do this are utilizing their tongue as a “club,” “a sword” or a “sharp arrow.” In other words, gossips & slanderers may not be wielding a literal weapon, like a gun or knife, but they have their tongue and they use it as a weapon to covertly destroy others and their relationships. In essence, they murder people with their lips. This explains why Christ associated being angry with a brother or sister without cause to murder (Matthew 5:21-22).

We see evidence of this repeatedly in God’s Word:

You who practice deceit,

    your tongue plots destruction;

    it is like a sharpened razor.

Psalm 52:2

I am in the midst of lions;

    I am forced to dwell among ravenous beasts—

men whose teeth are spears and arrows,

    whose tongues are sharp swords.

Psalm 57:4

See what they spew from their mouths—

    the words from their lips are sharp as swords,

    and they think, “Who can hear us?”

Psalm 59:7

A lot of gossips & slanderers will put on an innocent act—like they’re unaware of the harmful effects of their talebearing words—but, make no mistake, they realize the destructive power of their tongues and relish using it as a weapon to destroy, even if it’s on a subconscious level.

What’s their motive? Hatred since “A lying tongue hates those it hurts” (Proverbs 26:28).

Gossips & Slanderers Are Two-Faces

Those who regularly badmouth others with their tongues are typically two-faces who smile to your face, but destroy you behind your back:

…they flatter with their lips

    but harbor deception in their hearts.

Psalm 12:2

Do not drag me away with the wicked,

    with those who do evil,

who speak cordially with their neighbors

    but harbor malice in their hearts.

Psalm 28:3

His talk is smooth as butter,

    yet war is in his heart;

his words are more soothing than oil,

    yet they are drawn swords.

Psalm 55:21

It goes without saying that once someone proves they’re a two-face—a verbal backstabber—it’s almost impossible to be close with him or her. As such, gossips & slanderers are their own worst enemies; they destroy their own potential for genuine, close relationships. True, they might be able to hide their backbiting proclivities with their charm for a time but, if they don’t honestly change their heart and actions, they’ll eventually be found out and no one in their right mind will want to be close to them, particularly anyone who’s remotely godly.

Speaking of repentance, I don’t have a problem having relationships with ex-gossips & ex-slanderers—those who have had a humbling life-changing encounter with the LORD and so have honestly ’fessed up and changed. But that’s not who I’m talking about here; I’m talking about those who gossip & slander year after year, decade after decade with no concern of penitence, even professing Christians and ministers. Such people are hypocrites, which literally means “actors.” In other words, they’re phonies or fakes.

Put to Silence” Gossips Within Your Social Sphere

David is described as “a man after God’s own heart” in the Scriptures and he wouldn’t even badmouth his enemy, King Saul, who was trying to kill him! When David later became king of Israel, he made it clear that gossip & slander would not be tolerated in his kingdom:

Whoever slanders their neighbor in secret,

    him will I put to silence;

whoever has haughty eyes and a proud heart,

    I will not tolerate.

Psalm 101:5

Like David, we need to make sure that gossip is not tolerated in our “kingdom.” This means your sphere of influence—your house, your neighborhood, your friends & family, your workplace, your school or class, etc.

I’ve come to really hate gossip. A couple of years ago someone said something defamatory about an enemy of mine. I guess he thought I’d welcome the information since the man was an adversary, but he was wrong. I knew what he said wasn’t true, so I corrected it on the spot and the gossip was snuffed out. Even in cases where the information is correct it’s wrong to condone the talk.

Speaking of which, it’s wrong to overlook active gossip. I’m talking about hearing people gossip and allowing them to continue, even though you’re not technically engaging in it. Hence, you’re absorbing their wicked words. How is this wrong? For one, because your mind will be poisoned by the negative information, whether you realize it or not. Secondly, by giving ear to the gossiper you fuel the gossip and are encouraging its spread. You’re also encouraging the gossiper to continue in his/her immoral speech.

If a ruler listens to lies,

    all his officials become wicked.

Proverbs 29:12

When a leader absorbs the lies of a talebearing slanderer, it’s not just him or her that’s corrupted, but those within the inner circle as well. Carol & I witnessed this at an assembly we attended for 7 years. A relative of the pastor would concoct stories about godly people and gossip about it. The pastor gave ear to her lies and thus it soiled the leadership of that fellowship in general.

The best way to deal with someone who starts gossiping in your presence is to either immediately excuse yourself (which speaks volumes by itself) or counteract the gossip with something positive about the absent victim. For instance, someone might say, “Pastor John’s not aging well at all.” Counteract it with “He’s such a great man of God and has so blessed my life.” Someone says, “Jill’s such an alcoholic!” Counteract it with, “Maybe, but she’s one of the kindest persons I’ve ever met.”

If the people gossiping are believers, you can stop them in their tracks by suggesting prayer for the victim and then do it—bow your head and start praying. If the gossiper is an elder in the Church, like a pastor, teacher, deacon or worship leader, you should correct him/her on the spot. Why? Because elders are leaders who should know better and are supposed to set a godly example. Be as gentle or stern as the situation calls for, as led of the Holy Spirit. If they’re truly spiritual they’ll appreciate your correction and commend you for it; if not, they’ll hate you for it (Proverbs 9:7-9).

Although I was never a problem gossiper, I’ve of course fallen into it simply because it’s so easy to do. The way the LORD dealt with me was to convict me if I engaged in gossip, meaning the Holy Spirit made me feel bad about it. I felt like I was being unfaithful to the person in question; like I was sinning against him or her.

On one occasion a person’s name came up to which Carol & I started focusing on her flaws and I immediately felt bad about it. I said, “I don’t want to be like this, Carol.” So Carol & I have gotten in the habit of correcting each other if a conversation starts to devolve into gossip. Instead of gossiping about people we humbly pray for them, just be careful that the prayer doesn’t turn into gossip-with-the-airs-of-prayer; that is, a “gossip prayer.” Unsurprisingly, this “buddy system” has helped purge gossip from our lives.

Titus 3:2 instructs: “speak evil of no one.” Chew on that!

I should add that political candidates in a democracy are a unique category. If they’re evil, foolish or incompetent and you have clear evidence of this, it’s your duty to inform the citizenry of the truth because voters are the ones who will determine whether or not such politicians are in power or remain in power. This naturally has an impact on the quality of your life and how freely God’s Word is spread in your community (1 Timothy 2:1).

Gossips & Slanderers Cannot to Be Close to God

Consider this fascinating insight from one of David’s psalms:

¹LORD, who may dwell in your sacred tent?

     Who may live on your holy mountain?

²The one whose walk is blameless,

     who does what is righteous,

     who speaks the truth from their heart;

³whose tongue utters no slander,

     who does no wrong to a neighbor,

     and casts no slur on others;

⁴who despises a vile person

     but honors those who fear the LORD;

who keeps an oath even when it hurts,

     and does not change their mind;

⁵who lends money to the poor without interest;

     who does not accept a bribe against the innocent.

Whoever does these things

     will never be shaken.

Psalm 15

Verse 1 asks the question: “Who may dwell in your sacred tent?” The “sacred tent” refers to the Old Testament Tabernacle that was used to house the Ark of the Covenant before Solomon built the Temple; God’s presence dwelt on the cover of this Ark between the sculptured cherubim. The second half of the verse asks: “Who may live on your holy hill?” The “holy hill” refers to Mount Zion, which was the site of the Jerusalem Tabernacle and Temple, God’s dwelling back then.

This psalm features a form of Hebrew poetry called synonymous parallelism where the second part of the verse says the same thing as the first, but in different words. In essence, verse 1 is asking the question: Who may be close to God? or Who hangs out in God’s presence? The psalm answers by listing several attributes of those who are close to God and hang out in his presence. Notice what verse 3 says:

whose tongue utters no slander,

    who does no wrong to a neighbor,

    and casts no slur on others;

In short, only those who “utter no slander” and cast “no slur on others” can be close with the LORD. This means that anyone who’s an unrepentant gossip & slanderer is not close to God, no matter what they claim or what position they hold in a fellowship, including pastors, apostles, evangelists, teachers, prophets and those involved in praise & worship.

People who regularly and impenitently engage in gossip & slander might as well be holding a blow horn announcing, “I’m NOT close to God; I DON’T hang out in the presence of the LORD!!”

Christ said, “By their fruit you will know them” (Matthew 7:16,19-20). Speaking of which…

Those Who Engage in Gossip Are Like the Devil!

The name ‘satan’ means “adversary” or “enemy,” which explains why he’s often referred to as “the enemy” by Christians. Satan is also called the devil, which is translated from the Greek diabolos (dee-AB-ol-os), meaning “slanderer.” The term comes from the verb diaballó (dee-ab-AL-loh), meaning “to slander, accuse, defame, complain.” The Bible plainly describes satan as “the accuser of our brothers and sisters, who accuses them before our God day and night” (Revelation 12:10). Moreover, Christ called the devil a “murderer from the beginning” and “the father of lies” (John 8:44).

Do you know a (supposed) brother or sister in the Lord who regularly accuses and smears believers? They’re behaving like satan which, needless to say, is not a good thing. Either they’re a child of the devil and therefore a counterfeit believer (Matthew 7:15-23) or they’re grossly ignorant and misled of the enemy (2 Timothy 2:24-26). The fact that there are “leaders” in the body of Christ acting like this is a sad commentary. Please pray for them and correct them as led of the Spirit. Don’t allow them to poison your mind against people—usually innocent people—who aren’t present to share their side of the story (Proverbs 18:17).

Now consider the linking topic of…

Faultfinding

While gossip/slander is rooted in envy, jealousy and rivalry (a spirit of competition), it’s also linked to a faultfinding spirit.

Jude warned believers in the 1^st century about false teachers; notice how he describes them:

These people are grumblers and faultfinders; they follow their own evil desires; they boast about themselves and flatter others for their own advantage.

Jude 1:16

The one description we want to focus on is ‘faultfinder.’ A faultfinder is someone who tends to find fault in others—usually a rival—and then murmurs & complains about it to others, which naturally poisons the minds of the listeners against the victim and thus creates division. This is something the LORD “hates,” as observed in the afore-cited Proverbs 6:16-19. Such criticisms are usually of a vague, petty nature voiced in a mocking manner; that is, with an air of scorn, condescension, insult and chortling.

James commented on faultfinding in his epistle:

Brothers and sisters, do not slander one another. Anyone who speaks against a brother or sister or judges them speaks against the law and judges it. When you judge the law, you are not keeping it, but sitting in judgment on it.

James 4:11

Don’t grumble against one another, brothers and sisters, or you will be judged. The Judge is standing at the door!

James 5:9

Wow, impenitent faultfinding draws divine judgment! Beware.

Of course, when a brother or sister sins against you, they should be confronted & corrected as led of the Spirit (Luke 17:3 & Matthew 18:15-17), but that’s not what we’re discussing. We’re talking about the tendency to pick out the faults in others—typically a person the critic is envious/jealous of—and then regularly murmuring about it in a mocking manner to other people, which spurs division and strife.

Everyday Examples of Faultfinding

People can easily slip into a faultfinding spirit, usually influenced by a carnal ringleader. For instance, Carol & I were hanging out with a few believers several years ago and one person started mocking a certain man not present who happened to be involved in ministry. We all ended up joining-in with mocking comments, except for my wife, who later said she didn’t feel right about it. It was easy for me to get in on the act since I was at odds with this particular man at the moment (a former best friend). The next Sunday I was scheduled to give a sermon and had no anointing; it was a struggle from beginning to end. Convicted by the Spirit, I knew what the issue was and humbly repented.

A more recent example took place on X. A man posted a video of a well-known minister and ridiculed him as a con man. I’m not a big fan of this particular minister, but I’ve read a couple of his books and heard a handful of his sermons. While I don’t agree with every jot & tittle of what he says, he’s a formidable man of God and I respect him. Dozens of others on the thread joined in with disparaging comments regarding the preacher, all trite criticisms.

So I watched the video to see what the issue was and all it depicted was the minister illustrating how to put on the armor of God and, specifically, use the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God implemented as an offensive weapon (elaborated on in this article). I pointed this out to the man who posted the video and he responded, “Did you see the look in his eyes? He’s obviously demon possessed. The Bible says ‘The eye is the lamp of the body’ in Luke 11:34.”

I replied, “He was simply illustrating how to conduct spiritual warfare, which you shouldn’t approach as Howdy Doody. You have to mean business.” I then asked him: How did Christ look when he astonishingly cleared the Temple of fools (Mark 11:15-18)? How did Paul look when he radically confronted a meddling magician on Cyprus (Acts 13:8-12)? These were mere physical confrontations; consider Jesus and Paul’s demeanor in serious spiritual confrontations during spiritual warfare.

A couple of others chimed in, but I pointed out how all the criticisms on the thread were vague accusations regarding the minister’s eyes or what have you. There was no meat to their carping. I asked, “Since he overtly preaches against sin and hasn’t been involved in a scandal, the issue must be doctrine. What doctrine do you think he’s teaching falsely? Be specific.” One person—only one—said that the man preached giving and receiving back. I pointed out how the Bible actually supports the principle of giving & receiving (Luke 6:38, 2 Corinthians 9:6 & Philippians 4:17), not to mention God’s provision (Philippians 4:19 & Proverbs 10:22).

So, I asked again, what specific doctrine does this minister embrace that unquestionably makes him a false believer? The only thing the critic could come up with was to say that there are videos about the minister that prove he’s a false teacher. In other words, backed against a wall, she couldn’t even voice the particular doctrine that proved he was a false believer, such as denying Christ as LORD.

An additional criticism of the minister was that he supposedly preached that believers will experience nothing but peaches and cream on Earth. I countered that I’ve never heard him say this; on the contrary, he plainly teaches that believers will face persecutions and trials—and all the more as one matures—but, thankfully, he also instructed how to overcome by fighting the good fight of faith (1 Timothy 6:12).

All I got back was crickets, which is good. The believers on the thread were hopefully ashamed of their faultfinding and penitent.

What David Said About a Gossiper He Knew

Observe what God’s Word says about a faultfinding slanderer:

¹⁷He loved to pronounce a curse—

       may it come back on him.

He found no pleasure in blessing—

       may it be far from him.

¹⁸He wore cursing as his garment;

       it entered into his body like water,

       into his bones like oil.

¹⁹May it be like a cloak wrapped about him,

       like a belt tied forever around him.

²⁰May this be the LORD’s payment to my accusers,

       to those who speak evil of me.

Psalm 109:17-20

There are people who love to badmouth others so much that it covers them like their clothes. It flows through their bodies like water. You could say it’s in their blood.

Genuine believers must not be like this. On the contrary, your noble character will actually attract the gossip & slander of such people. This is why the Lord said, “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me” (Matthew 5:11).

The Spiritual Warrior’s life must be so opposed to the carnal way of this lost & dying world that your very existence is an act of rebellion against the darkness of this world—a righteous rebellion.

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